don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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