Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
