Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
