You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I'm both gender and math confused
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
