do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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