WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
