Slut skills are useful in every country.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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