ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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