Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
