so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize