I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
