Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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