Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
