And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize
