he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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