sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
