All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
