hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We had to coat check the pizza.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
