Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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