I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
