Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
