i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
