I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
