that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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