Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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