porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
