How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
