the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
