Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
