you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Randomize
