so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She bit a glass in half.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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