found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
