who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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