It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
