Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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