I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize