Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
