they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
