have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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