I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
