We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize