I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
