I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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