i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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