didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I have demons in me.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
