I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
