Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
