I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
My liver just had a heart attack.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Randomize
