I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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