TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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