Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
